10 things I have learnt over the past year

I have never been one to celebrate new year's or make new year resolutions. The passing years are usually just a day for me. But the past year has been different for me and my family. Looking back at it now, I realise that I have gone through a lot of changes. Changes that wouldn't have seemed possible a year ago and in going through with these changes I realise that I have learnt a few things about myself. Things that I find are of big importance to me.

1. I rediscovered my connection with Allah. I was always a "Muslim" earlier but last year has made me question a lot of my actions and cry out for help. I have gone through a whole spectrum of depression, fear, anger, dejection, joy, hope, contentment etc. There have been many times that I have cried out for help from Him in the night and have been so depressed that I couldn't even eat. My past actions came back to haunt me over and over. I was so fearful of missing out on His mercy and I cried out for His help until I had tears flowing down. Then He helped me see something about myself. I learnt that I was never going to be perfect in my actions and all I could do was to do the best I could within my ability and all my weaknesses, then leave the rest to Him. Insha Allah, He will be merciful towards me. I learnt that it it is easier to put in your best effort when you believe that Allah will help you through all the trials of life.
2. I spent a lot of time away from my wife and son. I learnt how much I missed them both. There have been many times earlier that I have just wanted to be away from them both just to have peace of mind but now I realise that the joy of life cannot be found on a secluded mountain but its with one's family. Its in the daily grind of things that life brings, we just need to look for it. I would not give up my family for the world now.
3. I learnt the sort of difference that the support of my wife made. Her encouragement and constant support even when I was jobless was so very precious. In spite of her own fears, she never let me feel down which I realise is of a value beyond measure.
4. Before last year, I always thought I was a decent father to my son. But after spending the amount of time I have over last year with my son, I realise that being father is something I am very proud of. I share a very deep bond with my son, a bond that is renewed every time he hugs me tight. His cheeky smile lights up my day and even though playing with him is tiring, it is all worth it when he holds onto me tight.
5. Before leaving Saudi, I was very scared of changing countries and moving to a place where I did not have any friends. The thought of starting out afresh in an alien country was always very intimidating to me. But after taking that major step of moving from Saudi Arabia to Singapore, I realise that I still have it in me to do what's right for the family in spite of my fears. I still have the cojones as the Mexicans would call it.
6. Coming from an engineering background, sales was the last thing on my mind. But when the opportunity came knocking, I grabbed it with the belief to make the most out of it. I then realised that I was not that bad at sales anyway. Talking to strangers didn't necessarily come naturally to me with effort and training I was getting better at it. Who knew I had a salesman in me.
7. The holiday in Spain/Portugal was a lot of fun. Managed to accomplish something that I have wanted for a long long time. I learnt that I loved travelling and enjoying good food irrespective of it being Indian or Spanish food.
8. I learnt that it is so very important to have the right atmosphere at work so that people can actually enjoy their work and get better at it. Something that was seriously lacking at my earlier job.
9. Going on a major holiday to Spain/Portugal with the family was a major challenge for me. But that trip taught me that no matter how difficult it seems at the start if you prepare well for anything and take things one day at a time, you will make it through as long as you have your goals in mind. For me the goal was to always have a great time with the family and that is what drove me during the trip. This is also something that drives me in my new career as well.
10. The last thing I learnt is that the amount of time I spend with my family is not always as important as what I do with the time I spend with them. Quality time with the family is always better than lots of time with nothing being done. 

Yusuf Dhu Nuwas and the People of the Ditch

The Quran has a number of stories in it, not for their entertainment value but to teach us valuable lessons so that we mend our ways and submit out will to the Almighty. One of such stories is about Ahlil Ukhdhoodh or the People of the Ditch.

The Quran says about them: 

4: Woe to the makers of the pit (of fire),

5: Fire supplied (abundantly) with fuel:

6: Behold! they sat over against the (fire),

7: And they witnessed (all) that they were doing against the Believers.

8: And they ill-treated them for no other reason than that they believed in Allah, Exalted in Power, Worthy of all Praise!-

Quran Surah Al Burooj (85: 4 - 8)

The Prophet Mohammed (PBUH) further explained these verses when he said:

Among the people before you, there was a king and he had a sorcerer When the sorcerer become old, he said to the king, "I have now become an old man; get me a boy so that I may teach him sorcery" 

So the king sent him a boy to teach him sorcery. Whenever the boy proceeded to the sorcerer he sat with a monk who was on the way and he listened to his talks and used to admire them. So when he went to the sorcerer he passed by the monk and sat there with him and on visiting the sorcerer the latter thrashed him, So the boy complained about that to the monk. The monk said to him, "Whenever you are afraid of the sorcerer say to him; My people kept me busy And whenever you are afraid of your people, say to them; The sorcerer kept me busy" 

So the boy carried on like that.

Then one day there came on the main road a huge creature, and the people were unable to pass by. The boy said, "Today I will know whether the sorcerer is better or the monk is better." 

So he took a stone and said, "O Allah! If the deeds and actions of the monk are more liked by You better than those of the sorcerer then kill this creature so that the people can cross the road." 

Then he hit it with the stone and it was killed, and the people passed the road. The boy come to the monk and informed him about it. The monk said to him, "O my son! Today you are better than I, you have achieved what I see! And you will be put to trial. And in case you are put to trial, do not inform them about me." 

The boy used to treat the people suffering from blindness, Leprosy, Leukoderma and other diseases. A blind courtier of the King heard about the boy. He came and brought a number of gifts for the boy and said, "All these gifts are for you on condition that you cure me." 

The boy said, "I do not cure anybody; it is AlIah alone Who cures people. So if you believe in Allah and invoke Allah, He will cure you." 

He then believed in Allah and Allah cured him.

Later the courtier come to the king and sat at the place where he used to sit before. The king asked him, "Who has given you back your sight?"

The courtier said, "My Lord, Allah!" 

The king said, "Do you have another Lord besides me?" 

The courtier said, "My Lord and your Lord is Allah" 

The king got hold of him and kept on tormenting him until he informed him about the boy. So the boy was brought. The king said to the boy, "O boy! Has your [knowledge of) sorcery reached to the extent that you can cure born-blinds, lepers, leukocdermic patients and do such and such?" 

The boy replied, "I do not cure anybody it is only Allah who cures." 

Then the king got hold of him and kept on tormenting him till he informed him about the monk. And the monk was brought and it was said to him, "Give up your Religion" 

The monk refused to turn apostate. Then the king ordered a saw and it was put in the middle of his (the monk's) scalp and ordered it to be sawn, till he fell, cut in two pieces. Then that courtier was brought and it was said to him, "Give up your religion" 

The courtier refused to turn apostate. So the saw was put in the middle of his scalp and was sawn, till he fell cut in two pieces. Then the boy was brought, and it was said to him, "Give up your religion!" 

The boy refused to turn apostate. So the King ordered some of his courtiers to take the boy to such and such a mountain, saying, "Then ascend up the mountain with him till you reach its top. Then see if he turns apostate, otherwise throw him down from its top." 

They took him, ascended up the mountain, and the boy said, "O Allah! Save me from them by anything You wish" 

So the mountain shook and all of them tell down and the boy came walking to the king. The king asked him, "What did your companions do?" 

The boy said, "Allah saved me from them."

The King then ordered some of of his courtiers to take the boy on board a boat into the middle of the sea, saying, "Then if he turns apostate (all well and good], otherwise toss him into the sea." 

So they took him and he said, "O Allah! Save me from them by anything You wish." 

So the boat capsized and all the courtiers were drowned. The boy then came walking to the king. The King said, "What did your companions do?" 

The boy replied, "Allah saved me from them." And he further said to the king, "You cannot kill me till you do what I command" 

The King said, "What is that command?" 

The boy said, "Gather the people in one elevated place and tie me to the trunk of a tree; then take an arrow from my quiver and say: `In the Name of Allah, the Lord of the boy.' If you do this, you will be able to kill me.'' 

So he did this, and placing an arrow in the bow, he shot it, saying, "In the Name of Allah, the Lord of the boy.'' 

The arrow hit the boy in the temple, and the boy placed his hand over the arrow wound and died. The people proclaimed, "We believe in the Lord of the boy!'’ 

Then it was said to the king, "Do you see what has happened that which you feared has taken place. By Allah, all the people have believed in the Lord of the boy.''

So he ordered that ditches be dug at the entrances to the roads and it was done, and fires were kindled in them. Then the king said, "Whoever abandons his religion, let him go, and whoever does not, throw him into the fire.'' 

They were struggling and scuffling in the fire, until a woman and her baby whom she was breast feeding came and it was as if she was being somewhat hesitant of falling into the fire, so her baby said to her, "Be patient mother! For verily, you are following the truth!'' 

So she threw herself in the ditch of the fire along with her child, to be with the martyrs in paradise.

Muslim

Yusuf Dhu Nuwas was the last king of his line to rule Yemen from 517 - 525 AD. His ancestors followed a form of Monotheism but he can be confirmed to have converted to Judaism. Some say he had usurped the throne from the ruler, but whatever the case, the fact cannot be denied that after his ascension to the throne, he embarked on a  campaign to capture and destroy Christian cities and churches. These were generally a mix of Christian Ethiopians and Yemeni Christians. After he captured Najran in present day Saudi Arabia, he massacred all the inhabitants who would not give up Christianity with estimates speaking going up to 20,000 killed.

Ibn Ishaq in his book of Seerah says that the People of the Ditch and Dhu Nuwas' army were the same. The people of Najran began following the religion of the boy after he was killed which was Christianity but when Dhu Nuwas captured Najran, he gave the captives a choice of either converting to Judaism or keeping their Christian faith and when the captives refused, they were forced to die in a ditch filled with fire. News of this slaughter flew fare and wide, reaching the Byzantine emperor as well. This lead to the invasion of Yemen by armies from the Christian Axum kingdom with support from Byzantium. And Allah knows best.

May Allah grant us the courage to face adversity with faith like all those people who were killed did. May Allah grant them paradise and forgive our sins so that we can join them in paradise as well. Ameen